This week at the Rapture: God’s into oil prices

consequently, we are all at greater risk of vanishing without a trace.

The Rapture Index rose one point, in response to Category 8 concerns: oil prices and supply.

I can just see The Almighty opening up the Heaven Street Journal and wondering how he’s gonna manage to pay for the commute to work, without having to quit the 24 Hour Fitness..

What ever happened to thunderbolts…..I thought God was into thunderbolts…why isn’t there a thunderbolt category?  Rapture Index Guy, if you’re reading this, what’s up with that?  You must have gone to a different Sunday School than I did….or maybe God talks to you.  I have to admit, he doesn’t talk to me. That’s why I read the Rapture Index every week.

See you next week, I know I’ll still be here, Rapture or no….

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3 Comments

Filed under Humor, religion

3 responses to “This week at the Rapture: God’s into oil prices

  1. Rapture Index. I had no idea. I guess God’s waiting until the price of oil gets so high that those of us left behind won’t be able to afford to drive all those SUVs that will be abandoned when the Chosen Ones are jerked up in the sky.

  2. All of the sinners must resort to driving those awful looking compact cars … hmm. Is this really God’s punishment, or is Toyota involved in an elaborate conspiracy with Satan?

  3. Could be. After all, Toyota spelled backwards is Atoyat which sounds like one of Beelzebub’s minions to me.

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